Lord, I Don’t Want To Be Divorced!

When the realization set in that after 16 years of marriage I would be divorced, I felt totally abandoned, almost desolate. Even by God. I cried out to God, “My God, Why have you forsaken me?” I had always believed that my God was a God of miracles, that He could and would do the impossible. That somehow He would just ‘zap’ my ex-husband and soon he would be back confessing undying love for me and instantly become a wonderful husband and father and the spiritual leader of our home.

But slowly, painfully, I learned that God didn’t create any human robots. He never forces anyone to do anything against their will. He gave us all choices. Choices to be, choices to do right or wrong; however we may choose. Slowly I have learned that I am, “hard pressed on every side but not crushed; perplexed but not in despair; struck down but not destroyed” (2 Corinthians 4:8,9).

But, what about the children, Lord? You gave these three children to two parents to raise and I can’t do this alone! And He answered me from His Word, “As I was with Moses, so I will be with you. I will never leave you or forsake you… Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you” (Joshua 1:5,9).

But Lord, I’m afraid. I’m not strong enough for this. There are three of them and one of me! And He answered me from His Word, “I have chosen you and have not rejected you, so do not fear for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. For I am the Lord your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, ‘Do not fear, I will help you’” (Isaiah 41:9,10,13).

But Lord, my children need their father! And His Word says, “God’s a Father to the fatherless” (Psalm 68:5) and “I will be a Father to you and you will be my sons and daughters” (2 Corinthians 6:18).

But Lord, I’ve been married for so long. I don’t want to be without a husband. I feel so ashamed and embarrassed! And His Word says, “Do not be afraid, you will not suffer shame. Do not fear disgrace, you will not be humiliated. You will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood. For your Maker is your husband, the Lord Almighty is His name; The Lord will call you back as you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit—a wife who married young only to be rejected, says your God. For a brief moment I abandoned you, but with deep compassion I will bring you back. In a surge of anger I hid my face from you for a moment, but with everlasting kindness I will have compassion on you, says the Lord your Redeemer”
(Isaiah 54:4-8).

But Lord, how will we live? We can’t afford this — we’ll go hungry! And He answered me from His Word, “I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread.” (Psalm 37:25) “And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19).

But Lord, the nights are long and fearful. Maybe I’ll get a big watchdog. But, then I read in His Word, “I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety” (Psalm 4:8).

But Lord, I worry, the future is so uncertain. And he answered me from His Word, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7).

Lord, I think about what my life was like in the better days of my marriage. I wish I could go back. And again, He answered me from His Word, “Forgetting what is behind and reaching forth to what is ahead. I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13).

Now, I look at where I am now, a single mom with three kids, a dog and a cat, and I feel a bit more confident and no longer fearful. I know that whatever problems or situations may come my way, my Father God will guide me and give me strength and wisdom. I’ll probably make mistakes, but that’s OK. For I can say with His Word, “I can do everything through Him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13).

- by Judy, a previous DRW facilitator

The 50 Dollar Bill

A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a 50 dollar bill. In the room of 200 people, he asked, "Who would like this 50 dollar bill?" Hands started going up. He said, "I am going to give this 50 dollar bill to one of you, but first, let me do this." He proceeded to crumple the 50 dollar bill up, then asked, "Does anyone still want it?" Hands still went up. "Well," he continued, "what if I do this?" Then he dropped it on the ground and stomped on it with his shoe. Now crumpled up and dirty, he picked it up and asked, "Now who wants it?" Still the hands kept going up.

"My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson... No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it, because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth 50 dollars."

The speaker continued, "Many times in our lives, we are crumpled up, dropped and stepped on, by the circumstances that come our way, and the things that happen in our lives...we feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value — dirty or clean, dropped or stepped on — you are still priceless to those who love you. The worth of our lives comes, not in what we do or whom we know, but in WHO WE ARE.”

And what you are is a unique, unrepeatable miracle of God. Never forget that fact. Allow that knowledge to affect the way you see yourself, the way you live your life, and the way you relate to other people.